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Post ideas for Duskull here.
Using invisibility, this POKEMON can quietly sneak up on prey. If it fails at first, it will pursue until its prey is caught, or until dawn's light.
DUSKULL are very sneaky and always have tricks underneath their sleeves. If a group of them gather, they will start shrieking in a shrill and mystifying voice.
Using invisibility, this POKEMON can quietly sneak up on prey. If it fails at first, it will pursue until its prey is caught, or until dawn's light.
DUSKULL are very sneaky and always have tricks underneath their sleeves. If a group of them gather, they will start shrieking in a shrill and mystifying voice.
Cranky Guy's isn't bad, but I must put my two cents in on this one:
Quote:
DUSKULL is only calm-spirited when alone in absolute darkness. It is believed to be created when a human skull is stirred by a supernatural force that enables it to have life again.
I dont think IB likes entries that talk about how the pokemon is made. Hows this?
DUSKULL is only calm-spirited when alone in absolute darkness. If a group of them gather, they will start shreaking in a shrill and mystifying voice.
Oh, its RSE entries are all different and each quite nice! It looks like we have quite a bit of freedom with this one. My take, as I don't have any preference between the three just yet:
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that the total inertia of its thoughts allows it to pass through walls.
Yours is pretty good IB. I just want to ask if you can make an entry that makes Duskull sound friendly instead of scary.
What do you mean by "inertia of its thoughts"?
Inertia being non-movement, so its total calmness allows it to pass through walls. If there's a better wording choice feel free to suggest, I'm not a huge fan myself.
DUSKULL's complete calmness enables it to transcend walls and other solid objects. An eternally quiet companion, it is often used by TRAINERS to vent out their frustrations.
Something like that? Eternally quiet is a slight misnomer though, Duskull obviously has a Pokemon cry. I can't get the ghost feel through though if I simply say "often" or something similar.
I think I like mine and your first one better.
IB's first ftw
How about this:
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that the its inert thoughts allows it to pass through walls.
When I hear "inertia", I think of "an object in motion stays in motion, an object at rest stays at rest (blah blah blah other forces acting upon it)". I think "inert" more easily conveys the idea of non-movement.
I don't like inert because of the sound it has. The way it's pronounced really cuts off the flow of the sentence almost as if there's a full stop, since the "ert" sound forces your mouth to move that way. Inertia was better sound-wise since the "tia" improves the flow. So, I ran "inert" through a thesaurus and got two synonyms I really like, quiescent and impassive. I prefer quiescent as it has more of that mysterious feel.
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that the its quiescent thoughts allow it to pass through walls.
I like the one with the word quiescent better. But I think you should change
"that the its quiescent"
with
"that its quiescent"
Because the word "the" does not make the entry sound good.
Yeah, it would be better as:
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that the quiescense of its thoughts allow it to pass through walls.
(If quiescence is a real word, but I thought it sounded good)
OR
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that its quiescent thoughts allow it to pass through walls.
I'm sure that "the" was just a mistake?
Cyndadiles second is better.
The "the" was a typo.
I prefer the better flow of "the quiescence of its thoughts" over "its quiescent thoughts", it also makes more sense grammatically because it's the quiescence that lets it pass through walls, not the thoughts themselves.
Eerily and eternally calm, DUSKULL's presence can be felt through a chill in one's bones. It would seem that the quiescence of its thoughts allow it to pass through walls.
Gets my vote
/agrees
ditto
uh okay. cool word by the way.
Yeah, I liked my first version of the "quiescense" verson of IB's better.
Basically, I agree.
Agrees with everyone.
Alright, looks like this is done!